Holy Sh*t! Airplane Manners, People!

It leaves you speechless alright, and sometimes not in a good way.

So, yesterday I flew back to New York after a week and a half with my family in Detroit.  The flight from NYC->DETROIT is typically a quick hour and a half flight, and relatively painless: key words being “relatively painless.”  Yesterday’s flight was anything but.

I seriously cannot believe the array of stupidity that I saw yesterday.  People have actually survived in life thus far being so completely unaware and clueless?!  The sh*t show of bad manners was ridiculous, both through normal airport protocol, and simple airplane etiquette.  C’mon these things we should all know by now, people!

First Offender:  The So-Called “I Didn’t Realize I Just Cut in Front of You…” Person:

By now, you have all probably had your own run-in with this type of person.  It’s the person who cuts in front of you, and pretends that they didn’t see you there.  This person might also pretend to be looking at something, than casually inch closer and closer, until they downright step in front of you.  It’s a sneaky little tactic, and most of the time these people get away with it, because the person they cut in front of, is too embarrassed to speak up and say something.

So, yesterday I didn’t have one, two, three, or four people cut in front of me.  I had FIVE!  Yes, you heard me right, FIVE.  It all started when a young woman with a giant suitcase cut in front of me while I was waiting in line to check into my flight.  It bugged me, but I didn’t say anything, because I was there very early and I decided to give the girl the benefit of the doubt.  I kept seeing her look over her shoulder as if she was waiting for someone, and I thought that was odd.  Suddenly a man and a woman, whom I’m guessing were her parents, joined her in line with two enormous suitcases in tow.  Before I even had the chance to process the stupidity of these people, two more young women joined the crew of three.  Each of these girls had enormously stuffed suitcases as well.  As the group stood there, loudly chatting about, I decided to say something.  “Excuse me,” I said trying to match their collective volume, “I was here first, and you…” It was no use, no one even noticed me talking.  They were so engrossed in conversation with each other that I didn’t even get a second glance.  I gave up, but it didn’t stop me from angrily brooding over it for the next twenty minutes, and posting multiple rants about it on Facebook and Twitter.

I watched on in horror as one after another stepped up to the check-in counter, and had to be told that each one of their bags were overweight.  They bitched and moaned about the additional charges of a bag over fifty pounds, and luckily the woman behind the counter  stood her ground.  The whole debacle added close to thirty extra minutes onto my schedule, and I was livid.

When it came time to go through security, I saw the party of five making their way in the same direction as me, so I hauled a** as fast as I could, and managed to successfully get in front of them.  A small victory for such an annoying fiasco.

Second Offender:  The Dreaded “I’m Going to Perform all of my Gross Rituals in Public…” Person:

Being a regular commuter in my daily life has taught be a lot about reading people while traveling.  For example, I can spot someone who wants to talk for the whole flight, and I’m good at predicting whether someone will be considerate.  The minute I saw this man approaching I just knew I was in for it.  I prayed he wasn’t going to be the one to occupy the seat next to me, but of course he was.  It’s always like that, isn’t it?  First of all, he stepped on my toe while getting to his seat, and also hit the woman in the head who was sitting behind us.  He never apologized to either of us.

It could have been an accident, so I chalked it up to an honest mistake.  That is, until he proceeded to get himself very comfortable, and one of the ways he accomplished that was by taking off his smelly sandals.  His feet reeked of vinegar, and everyone around us turned to see who was creating the stench.  If that wasn’t enough, he picked and prodded his smelly feet for at least a half hour, while I tried not to gag.

Eventually he passed out into a peaceful slumber, but he was the only one who found peace.  The rest of us had to listen on as he noisily snored, and I personally had to deal with his elbows as he slept with both of his arms up above his head.  Don’t even get me started on the offensive body odor that emanated from his pits.  When he finally awoke, he got up to use the restroom, and stayed in their for at least fifteen minutes.  When he finally resurfaced, I decided to use the bathroom as well.  It wasn’t a surprise to me, when I walked into the cramped space that he carelessly left the toilet seat up, and may or may not have urinated all over the bathroom floor.

The flight ended up being terribly delayed because of rain storms in New York, so we circled around for close to an hour, and until it was safe to land.  For the rest of the flight I tried my best to tune him and all of his bad manners.  I think I actually succeeded at it for a little bit, too, but by that time the flight was over anyhow.

I really thought I had seen it all between the subway in New York, and traveling on the Long Island Railroad.  However, yesterday it became obvious to me that there is clearly still a lot more to see.  Lucky me.

Does anyone else have any bad manner airport/airplane experiences to share?!  Is anyone else disgusted by how some people behave?

~The End

Photo by Pinterest.

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32 thoughts on “Holy Sh*t! Airplane Manners, People!

  1. “A mans manners are a mirror in which he shows his portrait.” – Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, German author (1749-1832)

    It’s funny Sarah, I was just thinking about writing about this topic the other day – but just bad manners in general. I work in a large office building here in the Tampa Bay area, and I’m baffled by how little care many grown adults show with the simplest of things. Break room cleanliness, loud gossip heard over an office partition. And the bathrooms – don’t get me started! I actually called a very well-dressed guy back into a stall to clean up after himself once. He actually came back grumbling and hopefully very embarassed. But I bet that was the last time (for a while anyways), that he left things that way. Oi veh.

  2. Poor thing – glad you survived to talk about it:) My other half thought I was rude a few months back saying to someone the end of the line is back there, however; people were cheering me on that I actually had the guts to say something. I remember one airplane trip where this person took their shoes off and started to sniff them and then preceded to sniff the pits – EWWW!!! Happy Thursday:)

  3. I’m glad I don’t fly or use buses and trains! 🙂

    I have demophobia so I get a travel allowance which pays for taxi cabs! 🙂

    Love and hugs!

    Prenin.

  4. Yes! I just recently traveled across country with my two young children and experienced some of the same. The polite way to exit an airplane is to let the people in the rows in front of you exit first. My kids were quite antsy to get off, and when I made the mistake of letting one person go by, no one would let stop to let us enter the aisle! I was appalled. I finally said, “Uh, we’d like to get off too…” and someone felt guilty and stopped. Someone else got their carry-on out of the overhead bin and bonked my daughter on the head, without apologizing. How do you not notice that? Rude!

  5. We’re becoming such a rude, crude society that when some one is well groomed and polite they’re the odd one out. It’s really apparent in airports and other large, gathering places, even places such as the happiest place on Earth, Disney! It’s also apparent when one travels the world, and Americans stand out like a sore thumb for their bad manners. Shameful!

    • I think it’s incredibly rude that you chose to single out American’s – I am offended by your rudeness and lack of manners. Each person owns their own behavior and it has nothing to do with their nationality.

      • I agree, Kelly. Since I was just recently in the Ukriane and Russia and observed less than nice behavior of some of my fellow Americans, I guess it was fresh on my mind. All individuals, no matter their nationality, are responsible for their own behavior!

  6. Your blog kept me laughing as I wondered if these were the same five people I just endured a trip from hell with. This family sat behind me on the airplane. I don’t know where they were from as I didn’t recognize their language but they spoke (and by spoke I mean yelled) the entire trip non-stop. They talked so loud that we couldn’t here the pilot; we couldn’t hear the stewards when they were asking us for snack/drink orders. They literally never shut up the entire flight. You couldn’t sleep. You couldn’t think. By the end of the flight not a single person on the flight was left not shaking their heads and rolling their eyes. Just when I thought it was finally over and we got off the plane…they trailed us through the entire airport and baggage claim! I was never so happy to get into my car and shut and lock the doors! I sat there for about 10 minutes just letting the silence seep into my pores! ha ha!

  7. Sarah this post is hilarious and you just have to laugh sometimes otherwise you would probably SCREAM!! What about RUDE people who talk on their phones while you are in a restaurant eating dinner? I cannot believe how loud people talk so EVERYONE can hear their business and they don’t care who hears!! Not to mention you can’t even have your own conversation because THAT person is so loud and annoying!!!

  8. That sounds like a lot in one day! Fortunately, I have never had any bad manner experiences in airports. I don’t think I will be able to keep quiet if I had. It irritates me so bad when people behave this way!

  9. OMG! I am so sorry you had a bad flight it sounded terrible! I did encounter someone like that revolting guy that sat next to you. I was on the train one day leaning on the door when I kept whiffing this scent of rotten bananas. I looked around and noticed it wasn’t just me. Finally when I look to my right there was this dude with his sneaker off picking at his corroded yellow looking foot. He suddenly looks up, it was apparent that my face clearly stated how disgusted I was, and says “Smells nasty right?!”. I cut my eyes and held myself back from spewing a few not so pleasant words that would have ended in a huge argument with this dude that obviously took a flight off the coo coo’s nest. So I think we can both rest assure that we will encounter these sort of people while in the sky and underground….unfortunately….

    • Omg, that is so disgusting, and I seriously just LOL’d. That is horrible, and totally something that I can see happening to me.

      • Lol sorry for such a late message. But so you know I read your blog all the time and you are so right on! Your awesome…oh and yea hopefully you don’t run into that funky foot on the train. Seriously I thought about taking the bus instead and well you know how that is….

  10. People who cut others in line are some of the worst. This post is so funny but it’s also horrible how people out there actually act like that. Also, I’m a commuter to campus everyday so I know what you mean.

  11. Pingback: 5:15 am. And not inspired. – Lead.Learn.Live.

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